I really dunno how I should feel now, but I'm pissed, tired, irritated, lost for words, hurt. Everything~!!! Feeling so confused again. So many things bottomed up in my heart again. I really feel that one day I am going to explode like a volcano and it will cause major destruction.

I truly hope that people around me will be more open and honest with me. Seriously saying that if any of you have anything against me, just tell me straight in the face and not behind my back. Talk to me if you feel that there are things I can improve on. Talk to me if there are things you wan me to change. Talk to me if you feel that I deserve a slap in the face and wake up my idea. I really dun mind you slapping me. Just talk to me.... That is why I need family and friends around me to remind, guide and advise me when I am not in the correct path and not just say things behind my back and complain to others.

I know I havent been putting my best in everything I do, but still I will try to. That is to say if you were to speak to me about it. So many commitments in life, but I still know what my priorities are. Let me know if I havent been performing as what I was expected of and definitely, I will do my best and commit time into doing it. Although the things you say will hit me hard, but at least I know that I will learn lessons from it and improve. Talking behind my back wont help me improve on things. Telling me straight in the face, will. Though at times, I will be hurt, but this is a process and learning stage I have to experience. So dear family and friends, if you think that it's difficult to spit on my face, then continue to talk/complain behind my back about me. Else be my nicest family and friends and guide/advise/talk to me and lead me back to where I started straying off my intended path.

Oh, and one more thing. If you are stressed or pissed with any other thing that has nothing to do with me, I am NOT your punching bag. Moreover, I am just a human. "To err is human." I have got feelings too, you know.......